I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
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