At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
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