I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
