We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
