What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
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