Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Randomize
