just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I didn't notice because vodka
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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