OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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