Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
