i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Randomize
