I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
