So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I'm determined to sit on that face.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
