Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
