Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
