Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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