Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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