it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
