I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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