"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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