You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Randomize
