We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
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