We should be called the Road Head Warriors
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize