my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize