I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
