uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize
