bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
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