Im at strip club and am horny
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize
