I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
