And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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