doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
