I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
God, you're like boner-b-gone
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
