Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Randomize
