did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
