operation harelip BJ is a go
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Randomize
