So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
