Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(847): View more from Illinois

we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.

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(714): View more from California

Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five

(1-262): View more from Wisconsin

bitch

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(203): View more from Connecticut

he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.

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(305): View more from Florida

After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.

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(308): View more from Nebraska

You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.

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(970): View more from Colorado

I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking

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(217): View more from Illinois

I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card

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(212): View more from New York

Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!

(202): View more from Washington, DC

I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense

(212): View more from New York

The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!

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