I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
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