At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
Randomize
