bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
