Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
We had to coat check the pizza.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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