Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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