we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
