im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
