Non-Jews are for practice
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
