His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
