Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
