laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
