We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
