you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
