I love black thongs
you have to choose: penises or morals?
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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