I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
