I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
